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Obama Arms Moderate Syrian Rebel

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As part of his plan to degrade and destroy ISIS, President Obama has begun arming a moderate Syrian rebel. Earlier this week the CIA certified that Husni al-Ziad, a middle-aged accountant living in Hama, was a "moderate rebel."

"We will continue to search for others, but right now al-Ziad is our man," a CIA source disclosed.

Yesterday Maj. Gen. Fred Hamilton, announced that the Mid East Logistics command had delivered to Mr. al-Ziad ten TOW missile-armed M2 Bradley Infantry Fighting Vehicles, all equipped with an eye-safe laser rangefinder (ELRF), a tactical navigation system (TACNAV) incorporating the Precision Lightweight GPS Receiver (PLGR) and the Digital Compass Systems (DCS), and a missile countermeasure device designed to defeat first-generation wire-guided missiles. The M2 Bradley is designed to transport infantry with armor protection while providing covering fire to suppress enemy troops and armored vehicles.

Today, Mr. al-Ziad received sixteen AH-64 Apache Helicopters equipped with laser-guided precision Hellfire missiles, 70mm rockets, and a 30mm automatic cannon with up to 1,200 high-explosive, dual-purpose ammunition rounds and laser, infrared, and other systems (including target acquisition designation sight/pilot night vision sensor) to locate, track, and attack targets.

"The M2 Bradleys and AH-64 Apaches provide al-Ziad with a unique combination of mobility, protection, and firepower," Gen. Hamilton stated. "Tomorrow we will supplement this with fifteen
8-inch (203 mm) M110 Self-Propelled Howitzers. These babies can fire three 200+ pound projectiles within two minutes."

Asked how he planned to use these armaments, Mr. al-Ziad replied, "Moderately. I am a moderate."

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